I am so loving life right now I say this because i have an art show coming up with myself an other artist I can not wait for it this is what i have been dreaming of a chance to show my art work to the public this so amazing i finally get to do me life now a days feel more like blessing to I am loving every minute of it and I will not let the bitter ones steal my joy nor my happiness I am in love with state I am in and I couldn't be more happier with it its like a breath of fresh air to me like some one has giving me a reason to live again and for that I am grateful and I feel blessed just to be living before I would walk around in a downward spiral but now I know for sure that my life has meaning and the main one I give thanks to is the Lord above for his many blessings I am so inspired by his greatness and wrapped up in his love an Lord I thank you ...

why is it that when you true like some one and you are together some one has to hate on the two of you making you feel like he ain't no good but me listen to the he say she say bullshit of others brakes up the two you to the point were you want to make thing right if we ever get time to talk if possible or even he feels like talking to me I do feel like we could had a goon thing going but Idk even though i do care about this person I just hope I can make thing right between us he is just so sweet but I also need to keep my mouth shut about it as well be cause my fault that were are not together right now but I hope I can come to some common ground because I have been liking him for a while now and i am not stopping till i can talk to him just once to apologize for my mistake.

this life is crazy if ask me i had the most strange dream last night but I think it had a deeper meaning it was like this I was walking down this road long road I may add and this three way paths opens up be for me the one on the left the sky was dark stormy thunder and this booming voice says to me fallow this path it will lead you to your destiny but in my dream I am think to my self do I trust this voice and another voice yelled out telling me to fallow that path  that lead straight down the middle and the sky over this road was a little lighter than than the last one and a voice says unto me fallow this path for it will lead to your destiny and I stood there with mix feelings about the first two then I turn to the path that was well lit brightly lit and a voice said to me in a gentle voice that seam so inviting what ever road you chose will lead you to a certain destination but I can not tell you which one to chose you will have to have to make decision on your own and the voice also says to me if you can pick the right one you can see your future unfold before you but the thing about was the destinations of the three paths were all mixed up so I stand not knowing what to do if
I take the darkened path will it lead to some thing great even though there is a greater struggle ahead or do I take the middle path the were that destination is uncertain as well if i was to fallow it were would it lead me I still stand confused and with lighter path it may look like it would be smooth road to take but what would be in store for me if I do take it and as was getting ready to take a step two of the paths crumble and the only path that was still standing was the dark path thinking to my self does this path mean that there will thing I've gotta go through in order to get were i wanna be it still had me puzzled with so many questions it was like taking a test with no pencil and the voice says once again WELL THE CHOICE IS YOURS and after he spoke I woke up ???????

AT WAR

I AM AT WAR SIMPLY TORN BETWEEN WHAT'S RIGHT AND WHAT'S WRONG HOW CAN I CARRY ON KNOWING MY BODY FEELS WEAK AND MY HEARTS NOT THAT STRONG BUT YET THE BATTLE GOES ON LIKE A NEVER ENDING ROAD NOTHING BUT BAGGAGE SUCH A HEAVY LOAD BUT YET THE BATTLE CONTINUES AND STILL RAGES ON SHOULD I WAVE MY FLAG OR STAND TALL AND COURAGEOUSLY BATTLE ON OR GIVE IN ADMITTING DEFEAT LET THIS THING TAKE OVER AND CALL IT A NIGHT NO IT MAYBE A BATTLE BUT WILL CONTINUE TO FIGHT BE CAUSE THIS THING I FEEL IS BIGGER THAN ME MIGHT BE TINY COMPARED TO OTHER BATTLES I HAVE FACED IN THE PASS IT IS AND IT HAS BEEN A HAZY BATTLE AT TIME A CRAZY BATTLE FOR GOODNESS SAKE NO MATTER WHAT IT TAKES NOW HOW MUCH MY HEART MAY BREAK OR MY FAITH MAY SHAKE I CAN NOT AND WILL NOT BREAK AMONG SO MANY MISTAKES I HAVE MADE AND WILL MAKE EVEN THOUGH ITS HARD TO GET THING STRAIGHT AND AT TIMES I GIVE MORE THAN I CAN TAKE AND SOME POINT IN MY LIFE ITS HARD TO BARE SO MANY THING GO WRONG AND I ACT LIKE I DON'T CARE AT ALL BUT WHEN I FALL I FALL WOMEN DOWN! I CAVE NOT KNOWING JUST WHAT HAVE DONE KNOWING THIS BATTLE I AM FIGHTING IS NOT YET WON AND BUT FEEL AT TIMES THAT MY HOPE IS GONE AND ONCE AGAIN I LOOK BACK ON WHO I'VE HURT AND WHAT WENT WRONG THE PEOPLE I HAVE HURT AND THE PAIN I HAVE CAUSED AND WHAT I HAVE LOST AND AT WHAT COST ???.

I have thinking about a lot things lately lie reevaluating my life and the way I do things like one thing I do think about is this why do I talk about my sister like a dog but I am always in her face laughing with her and her knowing that how I feel about her still remains yes she does frustrate me like crazy and it like if you have a problem with me tell me but I know she won't I will just continue to be the but of her jokes like usual I may not like but it what can I do I can try to to tell her how I feel but knowing her she won't care because to me she is not that touchy person how to talk to someone when you know there heart seems harden for what ever reason I have my own things to work on I know like the way I am with people or even or act toward people including my own family because I feel like I am distant from them and I feel that way because of how I act around them for example its the way I am so disrespectful towards them I say my little things I say  when I get angry or upset but I shouldn't get so up set that i call my mother a bitch at times that's or what have you or say what any harsh about her or any one I sit up there talking like I am the victim when I know I am also part of the problem or that situation so why should I keep continuing to act like I am not the problem when in actuality I am if I didn't act like its all about me all the times and actually and open my eyes and see the big picture and to know and realize that there are other people involved that are effected by my actions and things I say or do but I am to busy stuck in la la land and not reality I need to learn to grow and understand as an adult because right know I am still in childish mode to afraid to face the truth about not just life but about my self deeply that's why I feel at times I feel so alone because that's how I feel the way I am headed if I don't own up to the mistakes that I have made ....

yes I am so tired of people trying to bring up my past and through it in my face I mean come on really I know what I have done in past why bring it over and over again like its okay to dwell about it I have don things in my life not even my own mother is not proud of and I no I am ashamed of but you know what I am also learning to come to pass with my past and trying to forgive it and the ones who hurt me but I need to practice
a little more of that forgiveness TO BE CONTINUED....

self thought

I love having time to my self because it gives me time to reflect on some of the issues in my life like where my  life is really headed or even on my love life witch is not going so well at this point and time still single of course or even one day having a family a little girl running around the house and if not that then other things in general but it gives me time to think about whats really important in my life like things I can do to improve my life for the better and that is one reason I love to blog also it gives me a chance to express my self in away that I would never imagine like no matter what I am going through I can express my self through the written  word that's why I enjoy it so much its like writing a book were you narrate the story and its the story of you the good the bad the ups and downs of life its self that why when my sister comes around I just sit back and listen even if she is dogging me out just to show out in front of her friends like what I have to say does not matter but if I can't express y self word of mouth whats in my heart I will right it down or in this case type it but if she ever read my blogs then she would have a different perspective on how I really feel more so than just saying nothing and let the bullshit that's why all the things I do write about I would love to turn it into a book not really a tell all book but a book about my thoughts my feelings on different thing and situations covering all aspects of my life starting from were it all began to where I am know just so I can say "MY LIFE IS AN OPEN BOOK I HAVE NOTHING TO HIDE!!" because we all have a story to tell I am ready to put it out there with no regrets of doing so just to show not only the world who I am but those who ever hurt me and those I have hurt also no holding back .

to those who criticize (never be afraid of who you are)

there is something wrong with those who mock and and tease those who are different if they would justo the hell  close there mouth open there ears and listen who are you to judge me for who I am or what I have done they say words don't hurt but they cut like knife pierce like daggers with every harsh word that comes out of your mouth no matter what say or what I do you think your better than me just because I'm a little different life is to short for any one to mock or mention how the next person acts or how they are or who they are not knowing what that person is capable of  they want to sit and criticize and over look ever aspect of the next persons life but they act like there to scared to scared to pass judgement on there own life or there to ashamed to look in the mirror and face the person looking back them what is there to be afraid of  take a look and tell me what you see I am only human me being criticize for what I know I am not perfect and I have made plenty of mistakes in my life but you sit up there like your on high horse and try to down talk me like your life is all good I will admit yes I am not perfect but the way I see it is people like to talk about you to other people but the don't have the decency to talk about you to so you can get that grasp of knowing what you need to change not only that its like you have no care of who you hurt when you say what you say about that person behind there back or whenever or where ever its like bullying by word of mouth not really physically not giving a damn on how that other person may feel or not caring at all on who they put down or let down and they won't have a clue  until it happens to them we all have thing to work out in life its self  but the constant put downs don't really help no one any if it constantly continues let me find for my self how I can really be I may be different but I also have my hopes and dreams my likes dislikes or what have you I am who I and who the hell are you to judge me I won't lie like she dogs me out in front of her friends i do the same to her to my friends it may not be right on both behalves but its like going to battle not with me but with that other person who can no seem to quit when it comes to put downs they don't give a damn a about feelings or how you feel and I hate I REALLY! do I see its how its easier to pass judgement or blame than it is to apologize for hurting that person wrongfully yes I know we have our pride but at times why can't we put that pride a side to let some one know how they feel about whatever I say GOD knows my heart and I know my heart but do they will they care enough to honestly they say things like words don't hurt they cut like a knife to the heart and to add insult to injury is like poring salt on an open womb you already hurting damn near dying already but that other person don't care they just leave you there to suffer that's how I feel about it and my question would be why ,why do this to me when you see that I am already dying if that the case just leave me here and walk away is what I am really feeling that is how it seems to me but question for the criticizer WHY?? do you really hate and despise me that much to were I am nothing but a BIG JOKE to you why is my life on display for the world to see and judge is how I deeply feel its like i have a painted smile on my face and a big red nose with floppy feet if you get what I am saying I know I need to change some things in my life but while I am working on me why not work on what needs to be worked on in there own life just saying in general mainly put toward my sister or who ever sits and criticizes the next person for what? is beyond me I am tires of it I am SICK and TIRED of it all and at times you think when will it end or will it ?  why pick and choose that same scab to peel of over and over just to watch it bleed time and again ?.

it crazy

Its crazy how even though me and my sister don't get along she still brings me up in her conversations with her little friends and it always something negative also but its crazy how so much negativity can come out one person as I said once before she for ever makes me the but of her conversation saying thing like my sister has the mind of a 2 year old or she is slow childish the list goes on but me now of days i just sit back and listen we all have issues we nee to fix but blasting me in front of your friends just to feel better about who you are that does not get you very far in life I feel like this she quickly points the finger at me for my mistakes but why not talk about the mistakes she hat made I am sure she has made quite a few in her life time to sit and criticize me but all I can do is sit back and wait her time will come and when it does all can do for her is stand there and shake my head because there will come a time when she will need me to do something but I will keep my head up keep a smile on my face and carry on because she is just doing her so she says but I know my heart and were I stand in a lot of things but the she sees other people is crazy why sit up there and say what you want to say in front of your so called friends just to get a laugh and I think about it all I am is one big joke to her all my life is to her is one big joke she knocks me down just to get kicks she will get more than her fill soon I understand I understand that I have done a lot bullshit in my life time but to her my life is on show at the nearest arena like get your tickets now just saying but its her problem is just that hers so what ever her problem is she bitter about the past or what because we use were cool as kids but I guess life got her now every things twisted...

I get so much life out every one here right now one here my brother is here from Cali and his friends are got the grill going my aunt and Unk here from the Chi I am in heaven right now I love it I really do my new little baby cuz here and it maybe rainy outside i but fuck that its all good you know its Gucci ! this blog maybe short but I'm loving it !!!..

I maybe 29 but I am feeling 22 putting away all the the things that have been through why must I dwell in the pass when I can live in the present I'm guessing no stressing at times now I feel like the future is bright and I know in my heart that every will be all right can't don't won't fight this feeling that feeling were every thing feels real and life is so appealing haters don't bother everything now is technicolor malty color bold big brighter hot like fire LIFE lifting me high then higher never gonna retire nor expire from this feeling no one can bring down from this sweet sensation its a revelation with no hesitation YES!! I love it place nothing above hated or love it !!.  

I don't understand why ever sense my mothers relative got her from Jacksonville its been crazy in the sense of him driving me fucking crazy he don't when to shut up it seems like he good at telling other people what to do in they house but can't control his own don't know why that it I understand you here to help my mother but he  come over her and it seems like he gets helpless its crazy how you call your self trying to help but have to call me for damn near everything I don't get at all ?..
And my mother I have been helping her out ever sense she was in the hospital and she has the nerve to say "You don't do any thing any way" its like she can't show any appreciation for any thing I do for her I call my self try to do for he I put up with it cause she is my mother I won't say I have a choice because do I can carry my ass home and when and when she does need someone who gone be there the way I see it is appreciate what you got now because once its gone its gone at first I enjoyed helping her but it seems lately she has become a a little over barring to me she did say thank you but what does that really mean coming from her I am just trying to show her gratitude eve though I may have put her through hell for so long I just wanted to show her thanks.    

I FUCKIN LOVE LIFE I LOVE IT!!!!! first of the good thing are the best thing to me I am sitting here with my peoples having a great time with my sister yeah at time she can be a bitch but i lover her I guess she has her moment were she can be cool and fun or funny and my cousin is so amusing but me i just sit back and soak up every thing like a sponge at times I like to do so because because its weird to me how someone who act like there better than or put you down for whatever act or are I may not have it everything but grateful for what I got and who I am don't wanna be any one else I am smart creative funny and the list goes on but anyway enough of that right now life is jungle and I am on the prow for any thing that enlightens me like the conversation i am listening to right now between my sister my cousins and my mother all I have to do is pay attention to my surroundings and learn from it all just think of me as a student and there the teachers so what ever they are discussing let me sit back and take notes right now there talking about there friendship this is not to put any one down or to dog anyone out it more like me not being like when it comes to them I don't blend in with there mix like oil and water I am water to there oil that why a round them I laugh because at time some of the stuff they say maybe funny but that's just that I am more into poetry or in art or even more so into spoken word to were I express myself differently than she may she is more so out spoken outgoing so just like she looks at me differently I see her differently I see her as this classy personality type to were as me I am more so I rather write my thoughts and feeling in the form poetry or spoken word through my art work or what have you that just how we are ...  

as far as the highs and lows of life goes my favorite thing about my life is the good times i exclude the bad because its the good times that mean the most to me rather its helping my mom in her time of need or giving my nieces and nephews something fun to do for the summer I enjoy the time I get to spend with them my sister acts like she don't care she has my cousin watch her son so that they won't turn out like but in my heart that wrong they are some good kids these last past two weeks I have spent time with them yes my oldest niece can be a smart mouth like she grown and running things but under the that so called tough exterior I know she is crying out for just one person to listen to her and what she has to say I was there when she was growing up ever sense she was born  her mother act like she did not give a damn about them she has three kids and I think its so sad how there mother wanted what she wanted now my parents have custody of all three and to me its sad because the little baby she is soon to be six and yet she don't know even who her mother is and that's to damn sad the mother was ready to give her to anyone and know she wants her kids back when she did not want them in the first place because all she is is a big ass hoe slash pot head its like she fallows were ever the weed is if she was half the mother she needs to be or is suppose to be she would pick her self up and get her self together completely and if she was a real mother and she really wanted them back she would get off her ass and fight to get them back but in actuality she don't want them she is still to busy being the bitch she know she can be and to me that is crazy
to me just like the saying goes "IT TAKES A REAL WOMEN TO BE A MOTHER!" because when I do decide to have kids I would want my babies father to be in my child's life no matter what ! I feel that I have both parents in my life growing up I feel like I would like the same for  my kids but also I do admire those single parents doing for them selves and for the sake of the baby either with out or with out help from a man and at times a man with out the help of a women I give all of a thumbs up for doing what they gotta do to take care of home or go back to school striving to make better way for them and that child I may not have kids at all but I see single parents doing what they gotta do to strive for something better and love seeing that I say that because its inspiring their out there out there working nine to five to keep food on the table clothes on there kids back and shoes on their feet and much more then you have the ones out there that don't give a damn they want what they want and now a days you got babies you have babies having babies and the baby daddy don't want nothing to do with that its all fucked up to me my question would why they wanna make excuses instead of owning up to responsibility and that's getting the kid wrapped up in a dispute that he/she should not be involved in that.that kid never asked to be here but their are but it seams like the child is involved at times and it pisses me off to hear shit like that if your mad at the father that who you get mad at not the child period point blank .

I see see how crazy life can be at times life its self can be an amusement park or like one in en every sense of  the world i say this because you get those people in your life at times that may take you through loops like a roller coaster or may turn you and your world up side down or at times make you sick to your stomach like the tilt a whirl I say this because at times it can feel like that its crazy because that's how life is for me at times you have those people that come in to your life at time and try to take every bit of sanity you do have and then there are those who are really good people to have around and again there are those who do take through loops and dips but my thing about this is I am sure everyone know those people at times it can be a friend or an acquaintance or whoever but I also feel like there's different ways to handle certain people my method is to just keep to myself I don't bother them they don't bother me because I feel like like this no one wants to be bothered by annoying ass people fuck the dumb shit there is so many other things I can be doing besides dealing with the people you don't want around you its better to be around people you have the most in common with rather than be put through hell by the ones you don't I have a group of friends that will always be there to help me out when ever i need or just to crack jokes to put a smile on my face a it feels good to know that they will be there to support no matter what your dreams are and that's the company you keep no I know and then there is the bad company the ones who just want what they want an don't give a damn if its hurting you or not I have also those type of people in my life and I am sure a lot of people have in my life time i don been through it the ones who only want to come around when there is money involved and once the the money is gone there gone to WHO NEEDS THAT !! at all so my thing is keep the friends around you that mean the most to you and those who you don't sending them packing I feel like this its better to have peace and tranquility in your life than it is to let some one or some thing piss you off like the saying goes "ITS BETTER TO BE PISSED OF THAN PISSED ON!" and at some point that's true but then at times its not it depends on the situation and if problems like that seam to arise be level headed a bout it and think of or find a solution to what the problem is and see if you can figure it out for your self or get some advice from a friend on what to do do but DO NOT EVER ! give some one the power over you to think that there your friends unless there is some thing good in it for them or there trying to get some thing out of it keep the ones you love close to you because there are  always fun times to be had with  great friends think a bout it the laughs the stories if the friends are really true those are the moments that matter like a simple gesture or them calling to see if your doing well or there there when your feeling down there always there to pick you up again or when you need with whatever there there or if you just need to smile a good friend is a pick me up and then some no matter what side your side or his/her (s) I think good friends are the up side to life bogus friends are the down side to life at time or should i say it like this good people in your life are like a fine wine it gets better with age and bad friends are like a a cheap wine you may think its good at first but leaves a nasty bitter after taste in your mouth after you have tried it so what   really say to you is if you wanna go for something good a great friend is the best thing you can ever have I should know I got a lot of them..  

What am I doing life is to short to be worrying about what my so called sister has to say about me I understand she can be bitter about whatever but that is her problem even though shit don't matter to her unless its about her I have my own life to live if she don't like it then that is her own damn problem right now I am working on my License well I had my learners permit but never got my license so that is what I am working on i put every thing else on hold to do so  my art work and every thing i will let my sister worry her self to death about me later sense she seams to want to mock me and make fun of me and make me the butt of her jokes when her friends are around like I'm a worthless piece of shit stuck to the bottom of her shoe I who I am but who is she is the question who died and gave her the right to think she is better than I am but enough about that thing I am trying to get myself my life back on track it may take a while to pick up the pieces and move on but I believe that its possible anything is I do believe it is I am going back to school soon but this time I will have to buckle down and study hard progress never works if you give up and stop trying so I will strive on just to make my life better and to strive to keep my dream alive of wanted a stable life because I do want kids and i do want a good husband and at some point kids but i feel I can't get that until I get up off my ass and get out there and get it for real .

MY FEARS

MY FEARS OF SELF PITY 

MY FEARS OF SELF DOUBT 

MY FEARS OF EVER FINDING AWAY OUT

MY FEARS OF LONELINESS THAT TORMENT IN THE BACK OF MY MIND 

MY FEARS OF REGRET

MY FEARS OF LIFE

MY FEARS OF EMPTINESS

MY FEARS OF SPREADING MY WINGS AND FLYING SO MANY FEARS IN MY LIFE KEEPS ME  FROM TRYING FOR EVER DENYING WHAT I SHOULD BE DOING THERE IS NO LOSING AND THERE IS NO WINNING BUT WHAT IS MY ENDING OR BEGINNING OF A NEW CHAPTER THAT'S ALL I AM AFTER......

 

 

my sister is the type of person that she want and she does not care about who she tares down along the to get were she wants to be if its not about her it ain't about shit I don't know why we is so bitter but she needs to get the hell over it every body has there issues with there siblings but with mine its crazy she sit on her so called high horse looking down on me like i'm gum on the bottom her shoe she likes to dog every little thing i do like she is better than me or i'm worthless or some kind of charity case like nothing else matters not once has she ever said any positive to me its for ever sarcasm that spits from her mouth like daggers to the heart i am sick of ite its bull shit or how the bitch puts me down i front of her friends like a hopeless case and she will always be better than me no matter what i do i'm pathetic in her eyes or she tells me one time that i am no good for her friends like her friends like saying her friends way better off than i will ever be the yes i know i am the laid back ,creative;ect... to her i am a waits of time a nobody no one needs to go through life day by day being made fun of called out there name or criticized or humiliated or even disrespected or told how to what to do by there baby sister she soon to be 26 years old just because i don't live my life according hers she thinks has right to tell you how to live thats bull shit no one need that my thing to her is she needs to 1.shut the fuck up i am tired of her im up here but your way down here type thinking too!!! i am not who claim to be i am not a stepping stone to were she wants to be just because i dont live my life like her or live up to her expectation of who she thinks i should be more like here i am not her and she is a negative person i can be when i choose to but with her there is no off switch .

I may have said some harsh thing to and about my mother in the pass which was wrong on my behalf yeah we may get into it but i feel lower than low right now there is nothing I won't do for her if she needs me to watch the kids I'll do if she needs squares I will go get them no matter how much we would bitch and argue there is nothing i will do for her my sister says its just be cause i want squares but that bitch don't know what I'm feeling and she will never know my heart like she gives two squirts of piss how I feel I may show my feeling differently but that don't mean I don't give a fuck no bull shit I love my mom like crazy yeah I under stand  that I put my mom through hell now she is getting ready to under go surgery my heart can't bear it I really can't I was always the one causing her problems taking her through hell she is dealing with a life illness and if can't do anything but cause her problems then why do I still come around if that's what i do I just ready to leave but that won't help me get over the bull shit that i have unraveled over the course of 29 years yes I do want to tell her how i feel while she is still living I feel like the longer i hold it in the more it will kill me slowly until there is nothing left my heart is heavy with regrets of not telling her over the years what has been going on with me or why I act like such a bitch I act like is was all about me but its not I have issues about me that need to be resolved if not I might as well waist away to nothing because its just going to eat me alive if let it I don't blame my mother for none of the shit I put her through and what I put myself through who am I really?? who the fuck am I to do my own mom like that right now its hard to see her in a hospital bed i may have done it but I feel like did but can't say that she fell yesterday and my niece was crying and i told her my mom tough she will be okay to calm her down but know I hear that they have to drill a whole in her head to take pressure of her brain and I am scared I can't take it no more I just can' t take anymore I maybe deeply hurting at this point and time but I was that little girl that use to cry every time her mother would go on her weekend vacations to saint Louis at that point and time i needed her and comes to show that I still need her even though I may not show it I need but I know i need to start just by doing the little thing i do for her what ever she needs while and when I am over hear I will do it that's my MOM if it wasn't for her i would not be were I am today she gave up her dreams her hair salon to teach me at home she sacrificed every thing for me  and this is how i repay her with years of fucking bullshit that's how to show someone appreciation to some one for all they have done my cousins in Chicago lost there mother they were young and they had o cope with that there is still so much I need to say to my mine while she is still here but its like were do I start I know were to start I can start by apologizing for the shit I have said to her  over the years and explain to her her what I am sorry for word of mouth no pen no paper just me why am I holding all this bitter frustration in its eating away my heart until there is nothing left I can't take it any longer I just can't I am sitting here writing this blog in tears mind you and I'm telling all this to a computer when this is not that something I should be talking to I should be talking to her my MOTHER!!!!!!......  

temptation

TEMPTATION:  Definition: Something that temps, entices or allures.
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There are so many thing put in this world to tempt you or try temptation has lure you in and there are many times were you fall in to it or at times trapped by it not knowing at times which way is up half the time i think of it as a hurdle you stumble over it and let it bring you down or you can walk around it or walk through it i feel that many given temptation are all like Venus fly trap waiting to strike at any given moment temptations are put out there to trick not only the mind but heart and your spiritual been as well it can also can also tear you apart if you let it temptation can also be a sexual thing there some out there who feel like there spouse is not giving them what they need sexually so at some point they are tempted to go out and find it in someone new i think its because they feel wanted or that other person may excite them or make them feel wanted even if it one night of passion at time those type of temptations can leave you with a sense of self  pity or with many regrets that you wish you didn't have in the first place but you think to your self what or who can one night hurt knowing you may have a family at home that loves you and needs you also get tempted to tell lies on top of lies to try to cover up what you are doing some say they gotta work late or what ever that reason may be to try to conceal what is really what is really going on but I feel that "WHAT EVERY IS DONE IN THE DARK WILL SOON COME TO THE LIGHT." meaning the sinful things that you are doing know will all boil to the surface soon enough everything will be put out there as if it were on display in a gallery we all make mistakes we all may fall short but we also have the power to turn the tables to turn a negative in to a positive if you think that way at time that come across our minds but we over look it half the time to me.
TO BE CONTINUED